deoxyhemoglobin:

I was chatting with a donor before I drew his blood, and he was a dentist. when I actually drew him, there was just a little squirt of blood and it surprised him

I looked him in they eye and told him “you’re bleeding because you don’t floss”

and he went dead silent

(via shutthefuckuplolthanks)

perks-of-being-chinese:

when i was a kid, i asked my dad where babies came from and he said something like “ur mom had a stomach ache and she went to the bathroom n then came out with you” and i feel like thats his way of calling me a piece of shit

(Source: perks-of-being-chinese, via whorrado)

laugh-addict:

whenever i listen to a song from earlier than like 1995 on youtube and all of the comments are “im 12 and im listening to this lol fuck todays music(:” 

i just

image

(Source: averagefairy, via whorrado)

cyclopette:

*wakes up at 9* nice

*immediately falls asleep, wakes up at noon* less nice

(via bittersweet-sweet-tragedy)

"She never looked nice. She looked like art, and art wasn’t supposed to look nice; it was supposed to make you feel something."

Eleanor & Park by Rainbow Rowell  (via nimzaj17)

bw6:

bw6:

I wanna feel the bulge in your pants as we cuddle

image

(via tequilaisasneakybitch)

pornstarwars:

okay so there was this girl who really pissed me off at school and over the summer i googled “banishing spells” and i basically lit a candle and said some stuff and now on the first day before school starts i’ve found out that she’s moved to a different school i’m not saying i’m a witch but i’m 100% convinced i’m a witch

(via tequilaisasneakybitch)

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